So I was sitting in the movies the other day with my BFF. If my memory serves me correct I was watching Fast Five, which was a great movie by the way, and my phone went off. I got a text message from someone. Their name was still in my phone because I'm not one to delete numbers. You never know when you're going to hear from someone again. So I'm chatting back and forth but I really don't remember who I'm talking to. He tells me he lost his job and he's sorry for not talking to me but he stopped talking to me because he started seeing another girl. In the back my mind I'm thinking why are you telling me this? Are you trying to see me now? or are you looking for a pity party because you're jobless and loveless? I eventually learned who he was but remembered that I had already written him off as a potential LTR(long term relationship). He's a felon. He's been to jail or prison for whatever reason, but It's not working for me. I just can't do it. The life I see myself having doesn't include him no matter how cute he may be. He mentioned he was looking for work and turning things around in his life so I wished him well and we haven't really spoken since.
I'm just confused why all these people from my past keep emerging. I almost feel like maybe It's some sort of sign and I'm supposed to have some self-actualizing moment but I'm really just lost. I got another text in the middle of the night and it said "How ya been stranger" this number had not been saved in my phone so i have yet to learn who it is. I responded and even asked who it was but no response. The number is from New Jersey but I don't recall knowing many guys from NJ and I the ones i do know are in my phone. So again am I supposed to be getting something out of all these run ins with my past?? Like don't go your normal route you'll end up right where you are. I think I've already changed so much and have worked on approaching things differently than i had in the past. Or have I already come across the person i should be with it and just couldn't see it at the time?
I'm re-thinking this 5 year plan of mine. Maybe I should make it like a 6 to 7 year plan instead. 5 years isn't very long. Considering I've been out of school for 6 and it feels like time has flown by, will my next 5 years be over before i know it and I'll still be alone and no closer to settling down and getting married and trying to have kids?
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